Awake’s Retreat for Survivors

Some personal reflections

Several months ago I was invited to help facilitate Awake’s second annual retreat for survivors of abuse in the Church. So two weeks ago I drove out to the Cedar Valley Retreat Center in West Bend, Wisconsin.

The weekend was filled with moments that, from the outside in, could look really small, but were miraculous for the people they impacted. Those aren’t my stories to tell, but I did want to briefly share some of my own reflections.

Early in the weekend I shared some of my own struggles attending my home parish (or any Catholic parish). The abuse that has occurred in the Church—sexual, spiritual, or otherwise—feels like a giant crater in the middle of the church. Yet so often it feels like everyone is pretending it isn’t there. Going to Mass can feel like participating in a group pretending, a reenactment of the story of the Emperor with No Clothes. But at the retreat I was able to talk with others, pray with others, and be with others who see that creator, refuse to ignore it and walk around it, but who still desire faith and community.

During the large group sharing at the end of the weekend I said that I felt overwhelmed with gratitude. I came into the retreat knowing that I had unearned trust given to me by my endorsement from the three other leaders. But the whole weekend I was welcomed and invited into people's conversations and stories. It was an incredible privilege to be there.

The word gratitude doesn't express enough how deeply thankful I am. The Awake community felt like home.

You can read Sara Larson’s thoughts on the retreat as well as reflections from some of the survivors who attended:

https://www.awakecommunity.org/blog/without-saying-a-word-you-are-safe-and-understood-reflections-from-awakes-second-annual-survivor-retreat

Also, please consider donating to Awake. They not only offered this retreat to survivors at no cost, but they also helped pay the travel costs for those attending from out of state. This community is the Heart of the Church.

https://www.awakecommunity.org/donate